Thursday, July 24, 2008

Day to Day

So I have Chemo # 6 tomorrow morning, the good thing is I never really felt great this round - so I won't fear losing that, ha. I definitely turned a mental corner this week. I had been thinking: How many more? When am I done? When can I have fun with all my friends again? When can I travel?
I knew I was strong, but it's hard when the world keeps going and I am at a standstill. I came to realize that this is a one time deal for me. If it takes me 16 treatments, then I want 17 or 18. I want to make sure this stuff never comes back! If I have to stop my life, I have to stop my life. There is a plan for me and I just haven't seen it in it's entirety just yet. Everything happens for a reason, right? The hardest things in life we are handed are just to make us stronger and this by far, is the hardest thing I have come across.

I will have some company again this weekend, Lara is flying in. This will be the first time she will see me right after chemo, so we plan on watching a lot of movies. It will be great to see her again - always full of energy and smiles!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey it is Tim, Kali, and Ian,
I just wanted to tell you that everything happens for a reason. I got in a head on colision witha suv on my motorcycle, I am not saying it is anywhere near what you are going through. I almost didn't get to enlist my life was on hold for a year I mistake my age still. But I really would have never met Kali and been where I am in my life. I would be infantry and still in Iraq with my buddy from school that I joined up with, or not here at all. I surely would not have met you guys. Everything happens for a reason, weather the storm, it'll get better. Remember the motovational poster , patton oswalt references in werewolfs aand lollipops, "Hang in there Kitty, YES I WILL HANG IN THERE KITTY!"
Randomness I know but it is freakin 530 in the morning and I am back at work when I left at 730 last night. Well, we can't wait to see you.

Love Tim, Kali, and Ian

Anonymous said...

Howie - You have so many visitors, you're one popular chick!

Much love!

Anonymous said...

12 Days and counting.Everything is packed,movers are all set and the University of San Diego has my office ready.Hows that for good mantra?
I will be giving you all my strength and Love.Maybe we can start new hobby/knitting perhaps LOLOL
xoxoxoo MOM

Bethany said...

So I can bring my knitting needles for you if you want...I may have a project for you...